Why Can't Exes and Their Families Just Die

On Friday J asked me to drive him to this meeting he had about a job. It was in Bellevue (which if you are bewildered by Seattle geography is the Greenwich, CT to our New York City) and I am a much better navigator in Bellevue than J.

So I dropped him off and headed to the very posh mall there. It's not as dramatically nicer than the others in the area as it used to be. But they are getting an Armani Exchange which is something that no one else has managed. It's still a nice mall and I went to do battle with Banana Republic (again . . . one of my new pairs of pants had a hem unravel).

And then I saw my ex-boyfriend's mother.

Damn it.

This woman, and actually her whole family, was incredibly nice to me during my three year relationship with her son. However, he was a monster. When I left him I never called them to explain or even said good bye. I just sledded out with everything we owned together rolled up in the carpets like the Grinch.

Don't judge me. He owed me it all. And I left him the big screen television (which J still bitches about).

So this was a little awkward because she was THRILLED to see me. Wanted to sit down and have coffee, maybe even lunch. And all I wanted to do was run away from her.

I made small talk from her. Didn't really answer when she hinted at wanting to know why I had left him so suddenly.

But how can you tell a mother that she raised a monster? How could she not already know?

I felt guilty. But I ran away. And felt worn out by the whole thing. Honestly, I just wanted to cry. So I went to Sephora and bought a new lip gloss.

I feel like a bimbo or a Hilton sister or something but somehow I could enjoy my new (and entirely too expensive) lip gloss instead of remembering that part of my life.

Went to that reception last night. We knew no one but the bride and groom but it was fun. Everyone there was newly married and all in love. We felt like old curmudgeons because by the time you are married three years you have established some ground rules to your marriage. You know that you won't always get along, everything won't always be rosey and loving. You know that he will leave his dirty socks in the living room FOREVER. We still love each other and I think we were as happy as anyone in that room. We just are past the worshipping each other's ass stage.

We're in the tolerating each other's idiosyncracies because we make each other laugh and besides who wants to train some one new stage.

Which, yes, makes us the very SOULS of romance.

Thanks for asking.