I Am Out
No I am not a lesbian, though I am fairly certain I could build a readership with the issues of a married-to-a-man-lesbian. No. This is bigger than that. Less socially acceptable.
I do not use toilet seat covers.
Now before you run off screaming Ew I just want to say, SHUT IT YOU PUSSY.
Goddamn we have become germaphobic in this country. You cannot get a disease from a toilet seat. Not one that would be prevented by a little paper thing. And I don't know about you but I wash my ass every day so I am thinking that most things won't live there too long.
And if they do. Oh well. That is what I have a fucking immune system for.
My mother never taught me to use one. Mainly because I think they started as a west coast obsession (we actually have laws here) and hadn't migrated into the midwest subconcious yet. And I have fake used them. How sad is that? I would use them when other people are in the bathroom. So that they wouldn't judge me.
But judge away fuckers. I think toilet seat covers are ridiculous. When the apocolyps comes those of you who use them will be the first to die. If you cannot handle those germs you can't handle anything. You are probably the same people who won't eat something that has been dropped on the floor and use anti-bacterial gel after you sneeze.
Give me a break. I am tired of even pretending to give a shit about any of this.
Call me when you are worried about something important.
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We have a new gal at work. Our boss brought her around to introduce her and she sneared at me. The new girl. SNEARED. AT. ME.
Fuck that.
I am trying not to judge or be mean here. It is so hard. It is against my very nature. I want to believe it is a facial tick. Or a nervous smile gone bad. Or she has Tourette's of the lips.
She better not snear at me today or I'll
Do nothing really. Talk smack about her here. Which I would do anyway.
Damn.
