Tantrum Warehouse
Tact Free Since 2003

One More Day

This morning I tripped and somehow ended up with a glass candlestick (purchased especially for Shabbos meals because I am all pious now, yo) up one nostril. My nose bled a little and is now puffy and red and sore.

Please tell me the day can only get better?

Spent much of the weekend lying in bed like a slug and having gastrointestinal pyrotechinics.

And watching the history channel.

I now know about witch hunts, the history of exorcisms, mysterious creatures that look like apes and why the Bible is full of references to UFOs.

I fucking LOVE the history channel.

I also watched this show on Friday (on the recommendation of the very brilliant Monica) called Dance 360.

Which was the funniest thing I have ever seen at four in the afternoon.

I am not sure why those people were so excited to dance in a circle. But there was a Filipino guy in pigtails humping the ground while a bunch of yuppie teenagers jumped around yelling, "tag your man!"

In my world that is serious entertainment.

Am so nervous for the election that can barely breathe. Our big plans involved staying home from work. Going to vote right when the polls open. Driving veterans to polling stations. And then watching the returns on TV while getting as drunk as possible.

Probably while eating large vats of salsa and queso dip.

And having celebratory sex if Kerry wins. LOUDLY.

Which I know is probably not how our forefathers imagined elections back in the day. But I like to believe that the less Puritan among them would approve.

I mean who doesn't like queso dip?

8:50 a.m. :: comment ::
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