Tantrum Warehouse
Tact Free Since 2003

Am Selfish

2004-11-15
The new meds are not going well. They make me feel anxious and freaked out. My heart beats very fast. And the gastrointestinal side effects are worse than the last set.

Which makes me want to give them up entirely.

Am I a big baby or what?
***

Went to sleep at nine last night because I could not keep my eyes open even one second longer. Was awesome. J tried to sell me on staying home today because I still felt crappy but I had to go be responsible and come to work and actually work so that we could make money and not lose our house and move to the dumpster behind 7-11.

I now deeply regret this decision.

I could be at home under a down comforter.

Sleeping.

With a pug on one side and a dachshund on the other.

DAMN ME.
***

My only hope is to just get through today as fast as possible. Which would be a lot easier if you could just fast forward through things like they were on On Demand TV.

***

Feel like a bitch. My mom invited her friend and her friend's mom to Thanksgiving. Don't really love the friend. Hate the friend's mom. Am already pissed because this friend always has to come with us on our traditional Day After Thanksgiving Shop O'thon.

Feel mean because these two have nowhere else to go and the aunt they always have holidays with just died.

Part of me is still having a tantrum. Like "SHE'S MY MOM AND THIS IS MY HOUSE AND I DON'T WANT YOU TO PLAY WITH MY TOYS!"

What sucks is that we are all adults and can't just say that.

I will have to pass her the yams for fuck's sake. I will have to SHARE THE BROWN AND SERVE ROLLS. WHAT IF MY MOTHER DOESN'T MAKE ENOUGH AND J AND I CANNOT GORGE OURSELVES ON THEM????

Perhaps I am taking this too seriously. Am such a selfish bitch.

Still. Can't she go steal some one else's Brown and Serves?

8:50 a.m. :: comment ::
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