Tantrum Warehouse
Tact Free Since 2003

Caziah Angel

So my husband has a new baby cousin. And the white trash clan has one more member.

Though actually we may not be able to include this baby in the white trash clan. He is bi-racial. This is no big deal in Seattle but apparently is the scandal of the century in this family. Which is amazing because it's the other shit this family does that shocks me.

First of all, J's aunt, Lisa, has to two daughters, Jennifer and Tiffany. Jennifer is twenty-five, going through a messy divorce since her husband won't pay child support and has moved herself and her three children in with Lisa. There is nothing really wrong with Jennifer except she has never worked and never plans to. With three kids.

Tiffany, on the other hand, is twenty-one and there is plenty wrong with her. She has a six year old daughter, Caitlyn, who is being raised by Lisa. In fact, Tiffany didn't see Caitlyn for almost a year once because "her boyfriend wouldn't let her." As far as we can tell Tiffany's main occupation is drug dealer. Though she does moonlight as a drug addict. She has been arrested and charged a couple of times. She is still using.

I have to give Lisa props for raising Caitlyn. Unfortunately, she just can't view her as her child but sees her as a grandchild. Couple that with the hard life that Caitlyn has with her mother and you get Lisa over-indulging her quite a bit. The kid is grossly overweight and isn't potty-trained yet. At six years old.

Tiffany got pregnant again. And regardless of how you feel about abortion if there was ever a candidate for one this is it. She wasn't even sure who the father is but she knows that he is African-American. That sure narrows it down in California doesn't it? So Tiffany doesn't want the baby and sure doesn't want to give up drugs for the pregnancy so she is going to get an abortion.

But she forgot.

Ya'll this is not the same as when I forget to get an eyebrow wax and start looking like the bastard child of Brooke Shields and a gorilla. This is an abortion.

Which she forgot.


So she had the baby yesterday. Named him Caziah Angel. Is that even a fucking name? I admit I don't know much about African-American culture so it could have a rich history behind it. It totally sounds like a throat sore (as in my throat hurts I think I'm getting a Caziah on it) or a design on the side of a dradle (as in look at the beautiful Caziah on this dradle, must be hand done). But even if it is a name is it one that we want white women naming their poor little drug-addicted-bi-racial-already-doomed babies? How many crosses does this little guy have to bear anyway? Wasn't her as a mother enough?

To top it off she decides at the hospital she does know who the father is. But she doesn't want the baby to have his last name because he is a "loser." And she doesn't want to use her last name because her father is a "loser" too. So she chose her mother's last name--which makes sense because you know that is who will end up raising this baby.

She should have done the kid a favor and just picked a name at random out of the phone book. That way he could deny he was part of this family. You know he will anyway.

J's grandmother is all worked up because what decent man will marry Tiffany now that she has a bi-racial baby? Geez Granny. The same one that would marry a drug-dealing-crazy-tramp-welfare-collecting-deadbeat-mother of two white children.

That is, no decent man at all.

We are all praying for you Caziah.

7:01 a.m. :: comment ::
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