Tantrum Warehouse
Tact Free Since 2003

You Kiss Me With That Mouth?

Man, Monica is going to be so proud that my site is the number three search result for "cute Korean names" (number one here I come).

What is the deal with strawberry applesauce? Who invented that shit and why? I don't even like cinnamon applesauce but at least that still tastes like apples. And is a normal color. But strawberry applesauce is hot pink and tastes like ass.

And yet they have been selling it for as long as I can remember. Does anyone like it? Is applesauce something you have to convince kids to eat by flavoring it like something else? Because its not like it is THAT nutritious. If they really hate it there has to be something else they can eat--that doesn't look like it was eaten already, with strawberry Kool-Aid and then vomited back up.

So America's Top Model (shut up, if you are not watching it you should be), what is the deal with all the girls that look like men. I know that they like the androgynous look--but usually that means women that can look like boys. Not women that look like they are drag queens. And there are like two or three of them that look like they have dicks. And a couple that are truly unattractive. So who do they kick off first? The one girl they have that is really really pretty. Mere seconds after all of the judges say that she is the sexiest girl there.

Of course in that same sentence they called her fat so there you go.

Last night I dreamt that I gave birth to a giant baby--like 20+ pounds. I yelled "HOLY SHIT" and the baby leaned over, slapped me across the face and said, "you kiss me with that mouth?"

Fucking baby.

7:25 a.m. :: comment ::
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